mybestkungfu's Diaryland Diary

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

don't go away mad...just go away

someone told me once that each person
has a different version of love.
that once you are close to someone's heart - it is akin to being invited to
their home. they will treat you in the same manner they treat people they are most comfortable with.
sometimes you are fortunate.
sometimes you just get backstage passes to their bullshit.

i guess i just regret saying my peace when i had the chance.
i didn't say 'you're so insecure it makes me sick' when i had the chance.
probably because i would have felt horrible about it the next day. although i do resent the hours wasted trying to appease you. trying to make you believe that i valued you.
turning myself into the person who rejected you most so you could redeem yourself in their eyes.
so i guess i want to say that i really hated it. and i really hated you. and i really hated myself for putting up with it.
on the upside, hating someone with this much ferocity is a little intoxicating.

11:34 p.m. - Dec. 11, 2005

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

previous - next